San Diego Adoption Photography
Adoption Story Through a Mother’s Eyes
Like pregnancy and birth, no two adoption stories are the same. As Mother’s Day approaches us I felt this was the perfect time to share this adoption story from a mother’s view. Originally, I was going to tell the story as I saw it through my eyes during the short time I spent with them. However, when I received an e-mail from this mom telling her story in her own words and how it unraveled, I knew it had to be shared with other adoptive parents. It is a beautiful expression of a mothers love for her child…
“The adoption took time but the love arrived instantly.
A child born to another woman calls me mommy. The magnitude of that tragedy and the depth of that privilege are not lost on me. I met Mason in the hospital when he was just four days old. The truth is that I loved him before I knew him. Even when there was just hope for him, I loved him. Let’s back up a little bit though. The calling to be a mommy started when I was about 18 years old, when I found out I couldn’t ever have a child. Through a lot of tears, heartache, IVF, surrogacy, starting the process through a private adoption agency then it falling apart because of a divorce in the middle of it, etc, I could’ve just thrown my hands up and said that it wasn’t in the cards for me. But I knew in my heart that wasn’t what my future was supposed to be. The yearning to be a mom never goes away. I started looking into foster to adopt. Admittedly, I was hesitant to do it. Why? Because the fear of the unknown, the fear that a child I built a bond with might possibly get reunified to biological family and I’d never see them again. I remember telling one of the first case workers I met that I was nervous because I was afraid I’d get too attached. You know what her response was? “Then you would be great at it. That’s exactly what kids need. No matter their age, they’re observant and that feeling of love is precisely what they need, whether it be short term, long term, or forever.” She was right. At that moment, I jumped in with both feet knowing the risks of my emotions, but understanding that this is about a child in need, one that needs stability and love. I knew that was something I could offer wholeheartedly.
Fast forward four months, after just experiencing tremendous heartache learning an incredible little girl would be leaving my home to be reunified, I received a call from a case worker saying that a 4-day old healthy little newborn baby boy was at the hospital who needed me. I don’t think I could’ve safely gotten to the hospital any faster than I did, practically walking in with open arms and tears of joy. He was absolutely perfect, wrapped up in his little blanket, being loved on by nurses. I took him home that day, named him, and had worked the foster-to-adopt process for about 2.5 years. I am the only parent he’s ever known and I know his entire life story. There are times when the adoption process is exhausting and painful and makes you want to scream. But, I am told so does childbirth. Haha. Seriously, though, in adoption, a child is not GIVEN UP. A birth mother GIVES life, a child a family, unconditional love. She GIVES a part of her heart that will never feel whole. She GIVES another mother a part of her heart that was always missing. An adoptive mother GIVES a life and family to this child. She GIVES unconditional love. She GIVES a part of her heart to another mother. You GIVE a lot – just never GIVE UP.
How did I get connected with Jessica at Jessica Raymond Photography? Well, we live in a different state and we love to visit San Diego often. On a whim, a few days prior to flying to out there, I literally Googled San Diego family photographers, a small handful of photographers were listed through Yelp, and she was the first of three to respond right away. Before I replied, I stalked her website, her online reviews, her social media, and her portfolio to gauge her photo style. After seeing that she too is a mom and photographs many families with children and does beach shoots, then I booked it with her. I can say that I’m so very happy that I did. She was able to somehow rearrange her schedule to accommodate us on the days we were in San Diego, she took us to a beautiful area, and was so patient and kind while my son was having an epic meltdown during the shoot. But you know what? After looking at the photos she captured, you’d never even know it. But it didn’t stop there, afterwards, she was quick to turnaround the photo gallery for me to review and really just provided an excellent customer experience from beginning to end. But more importantly, she gave us invaluable memories that we will have for a lifetime. I felt like a gained a friend working with Jessica.
What have I learned throughout this adoption process? I am not afraid to grieve. I am afraid of what will happen to these children if no one took the risk to love them. And if you know that you’re meant to be a mommy to a well-deserving child, then it doesn’t matter how they make their way to you…what matters is that they do. Through all the loving moments…as well as all the crazy temper tantrums… I cherish every single second with my son. Every time I am able to nurse his colds or coughs back to health, I’m thankful. Every time he calls me mommy, I never take that sound for granted. If you’ve made it this far into this blog post, then here’s how I knew it was meant to be. Mason and I have the same birthday. Fate? Perhaps. Special? Indeed.”
I am so blessed that this mom reached out to me and I was able to be a part in documenting this incredible life changing time in her life. This session was so special and it truly captures the unbreakable bond between a mother and her child. Thank you for sharing your amazing story with us. I know it will touch the hearts of many moms. Xo
Based in North County San Diego, Jessica serves San Diego, as well as but not limited to Carlsbad, Encinitas, San Marcos, San Elijo, Oceanside, Vista, Escondido, La Jolla, and La Costa. To be the first to know about specials and events be sure to follow her on Facebook and Instagram!
jessica@jessicaraymondphotography.com | 831-261-6165 | San Marcos, Ca.
